Shockoe and Awe
If you've been reading this blog for a while, you may recall that I used to live in Richmond, where I sometimes found occasion to remark on the city's struggle to remake itself.
This is where I call a truce.
In fact, I want to make a peace offering to Jim Ukrop and all the people who've worked so hard to turn Richmond's downtown from an embarrassment into a disaster. In fact, it was Ukrop himself who once told me that his dad said it was better to make a fast nickel than a slow dime. By gum, Jim, here comes a fast nickel.
Last week, the Washington Post reported that Winchester, Va., and environs have begun to market themselves to federal agencies with an odd pitch: That they're far enough from the center of D.C. to survive a nuclear explosion.
That may seem Cold War-era thinking to people who don't remember the Cold War, when everyone on the East Coast assumed they'd die in a nuclear attack no matter where they lived. But this isn't about one country nuking us Day After style, it's about fears of a smaller-scale, though still deadly, terrorist attack.
Where does Richmond come into this? Stay with me.
Winchester is claiming that it's a safe place to relocate because it's 70 miles from downtown D.C. Well, Richmond is 90 miles from downtown D.C. That's fully 20 miles better than Winchester!
Of course, to make this marketing pitch work, you'll need to rally your best people. And you'll have to admit that there are advantages to staying in D.C. that are worth countering. That means--gulp--acknowledging that some might think D.C. is a more desirable place to live. So you can't sniff about the traffic, how you don't want "Richmond to turn into Northern Virginia," or act like you don't want to be closer to Ikea, anyway.
Here's your pitch: Anyone or anything that moves to Richmond effectively disappears off the nation's consciousness. It's entirely impossible that if, say, DEA moves to Richmond, most people will forget about the DEA! (Hey, it worked for Cracker.) Bad guys will grow complacent. Then DEA strikes! Substitute NEA or the Education Department, and conservatives are happy, too! Everybody wins.
But time is short. I hear Haymarket's making a serious play for the Bureau of Engraving and Printing. Act now, Jim.
Surely it's a better plan than this.
This is where I call a truce.
In fact, I want to make a peace offering to Jim Ukrop and all the people who've worked so hard to turn Richmond's downtown from an embarrassment into a disaster. In fact, it was Ukrop himself who once told me that his dad said it was better to make a fast nickel than a slow dime. By gum, Jim, here comes a fast nickel.
Last week, the Washington Post reported that Winchester, Va., and environs have begun to market themselves to federal agencies with an odd pitch: That they're far enough from the center of D.C. to survive a nuclear explosion.
That may seem Cold War-era thinking to people who don't remember the Cold War, when everyone on the East Coast assumed they'd die in a nuclear attack no matter where they lived. But this isn't about one country nuking us Day After style, it's about fears of a smaller-scale, though still deadly, terrorist attack.
Where does Richmond come into this? Stay with me.
Winchester is claiming that it's a safe place to relocate because it's 70 miles from downtown D.C. Well, Richmond is 90 miles from downtown D.C. That's fully 20 miles better than Winchester!
Of course, to make this marketing pitch work, you'll need to rally your best people. And you'll have to admit that there are advantages to staying in D.C. that are worth countering. That means--gulp--acknowledging that some might think D.C. is a more desirable place to live. So you can't sniff about the traffic, how you don't want "Richmond to turn into Northern Virginia," or act like you don't want to be closer to Ikea, anyway.
Here's your pitch: Anyone or anything that moves to Richmond effectively disappears off the nation's consciousness. It's entirely impossible that if, say, DEA moves to Richmond, most people will forget about the DEA! (Hey, it worked for Cracker.) Bad guys will grow complacent. Then DEA strikes! Substitute NEA or the Education Department, and conservatives are happy, too! Everybody wins.
But time is short. I hear Haymarket's making a serious play for the Bureau of Engraving and Printing. Act now, Jim.
Surely it's a better plan than this.
posted by Andrew Beaujon at 23:23
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